AP - Wasilla
In a perfectly planned antidote to her disastrous press encounters, Governess Sarah Palin has announced the pre-election marriage of her pregnant daughter Bristol to hockey playing homunculus Levi Johnston.
In a media coup that will rival the royal wedding of Diana to the Prince of Wales, the hometown marriage of this rough-neck Romeo to his hillbilly hook-up promises to wipe Iraq, the Wall Street crisis and the debates from the front page of every newspaper in the country.
And John McCain could not be more pleased, "I love weddings," the senator beamed, "America loves weddings. What's not to love?" Clearly, he will love commanding the news cycle for the week of the nuptials. He added, "Oh, I'll be there, you can bet on it. And Cindy. She's got this smokin' hot pink outfit. She's Maid of Honor, you know. Matron, I guess... whatever."
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