Palin Mobilizes National Guard

   AP - Juneau

   In a shocking development to the Troopergate scandal, Alaskan governess and VP hopeful Sarah Palin has mobilized the Alaskan National Guard, thus ending any official investigation into her misuse of power probe.

   Siting "internet chatter" about terrorist plots, Palin has embraced her mantle as Commander of the National Guard and issued the statement that "All citizens of our great state should be on the look-out for traitors and suspicious activities." 

   Under orders to "arrest all citizens spreading traitorous lies and thereby sowing the seeds of sedition", the Guard has taken into custody thirteen members of the Alaska House of Representatives and four state senators.

   Also caught in the dragnet was Palin's former secretary Edith Joseph, a Tlinget native and critic of the governor's sudden change of behavior as a national figure. Now under detention in Juneau, Joseph made a prohibited cellphone call to the Anchorage Times. "She is a bad one, that woman. All of sudden she goes Lower Forty-Eight on us." The call was cut short as the angry Joseph was discovered using the contraband phone. Her final comment brings to the forefront her concerns for Alaska's future, "Somebody gotta stop her!"