McCain Snaps - Calls Palin 'the C Word'

   AP - Des Moines, Iowa

   In a shocking moment of angry venom, presidential candidate and old fart John McCain called his more popular vice-presidential running mate a "simple-minded cunt".

   Seemingly vexed by the low turn-out of media and supporters at a Des Moines rally, the fiesty Republican was overheard berating his staff, "I want that simple-minded cunt at every podunk whistle-stop and coffee shop I'm at - who the hell does she think she is - Cheney?"

   Campaign spokesman Sally Rankle tried to sell the outburst as "just another instance of the liberal media taking Senator McCain's words out of context." She added, "He was a P.OW. remember? You people try living in a box and eating spiders. See how you like it!"

   Rankle then lectured the gathered reporters to "listen better." She characterized the situation as one of unclear listening skills on the part of the press corps. "What the senator said was - Governor Palin is a simple country girl, with small town values, someone you can have a coffee with." 

   But members of the press covering the McCain campaign weren't buying it. CNN reporter Dana Brash was heard to mutter, "Yeah, right... and I'm skilled journalist."