AP - Chicago
While making the rounds on the national news and talk show circuits to plead his case, sleazy Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich announced to Barbara Walters on the View that his Senate replacement pick for Barack Obama's vacant seat would now be Caroline Kennedy.
When Walters asked why Caroline Kennedy and why now, the governor was typically candid. "Are you kidding me? She's loaded." he explained.
"And Burris got me absolutely nothing. I thought I'd at least get Black points with him - but, nothing... bupkis."
Ms. Walters, magically inserted into the interview by means of a satellite feed, seemed to be addressing Blagojevich from the future. She pressed him on his wiretapped phone calls and made an attempt to get to a deeper level of understanding by probing, "If you could be any kind of tree, what would it be?" He had no answer, dodging yet another inquiry.
The disgraced governor than joined the panel of View vixens and fielded their questions about his switch to Caroline Kennedy as his Senate pick.
Former Star Trek counsellor Guinan, Whoopee Goldberg, led the inquisition by first warming the hot seat, "We, at the View, want to thank you for coming on our show, but tell us Governor, Caroline Kennedy? Really? Are you out of your freakin' mind?"
Blagojevich, cool as a cuke, merely smiled. "Chicks dig me, Whoopee." He then added, "You dig me. I can tell."
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